WORST JOURNEY EVER

O HELLISH NIGHT

IMAGINE GOING OVER A SERIES OF BUMPS
WORSE THAN ANY BUMP YOU'D
EVER GO OVER AT SPEED
IN EUROPE OR AMERICA
AND GOING OVER ABOUT
ONE A SECOND OR SO OF THEM
FOR NINETY MINUTES
...
AND THEN EVERY COUPLE OF MINUTES OR SO
GOING OVER A REALLY BIG ONE

and then the whole thing happening again

...
worst journey ever
o hellish night
kathmandu to kakadbitti, the eastern Nepalese border
meant to be 15 hours
but takes 20
and you spend the first five hours in the
worst traffic jam ever
worse than getting out of glastonbury festival
the getting-out-of-the-kathmandu-valley bit
which is endless
and then settling down toa crazy speed on terrible roads
the main arterial road in this country
and yet appalling
...
and the driver always like this?
or the driver making up for time?
...
and the bashes
the crashes
the bangs and the kerrangs
AND THE BASHES
AND THE CRASHES
AND THE BANGS
AND THE KERRANGS
...
so you are tenderised
exhausted
boneshaken
bone-shattered
bone-battered
sleepless
aching
cursing
AND THEN A REALLY BIG BANG FLIES YOU OUT OF YOUR SLEEP INTO THE OVERHANG
for hour upon hour
upon hour
...

and meanwhile

not least the limb ache the head ache

the grind the gruel the numb the urrhh

you rashly ordered some lukewarm chicken and

o yes

you are suffering the consequences

...

o yes

so you are wiped for two days while recovering