genetically disposed to distraction

...
so they have this bloody fundraising thing before my show
called sweet on the fringe
it involves some cheese
some rubber chickens
and the william tell overture
which is okish, not great but not terrible
...
except bloody yesterday its chris gibbs
funniest man in the fringe
and he goes on to conduct this fundraising cheese
and the first thing he says is
jem has asked me not to be funny
which could be described as the worst possible start for me
cos
the audience all perk up when they see him cos
he's chris gibbs and
he's bloody funny and
probably the funniest bloke in the fringe and
they're getting a bit of him for nothing which is
great
except some arsehole
the performer they are about to endure
me
has apparently for miserable personal selfish reasons
demanded he not be funny
...
meaning they're opinion of me has somewhat
declined
by the time i
even start
...

ta chris
like ta

...

and did not enjoy the show

i thought i'd missed out a paragraph early on

and, being rather busy,

i have no opportunity to think back and check
so i'm convinced i've screwed up

and the audience vibe is like i'm

screwing up

so i steadfastly battle joylessly to the

end of what

seemed a poor show

and feel pretty lousy as a result...

and then my mate grindl the clown shows up
and then another pair of trousers burst
meaning i have trashed all my pants
the sweat has rotted them all
how ghastly
...

but this morning i do

think through the show and realise i

didn't miss anything out

...

i simply persuaded myself i did

and couldn't check so i was basically

shooting myself in the foot

...

and it hurt

...

...

so i now upgrade show from poor to ok

nice morning stroll along to kitsilano

the yachts the water the clouds the mountains the bridge the greenery

before a stodgy moussaka and the

noontime daily snooze because i

wake so early after the

cats meow 4 buck beeryness

... grindl and tj and keir and evelyn and johnny tomorrow and jeremy and elison and john stewart and barry

...

a rare sighting of TJ

a man i kinda worry about

hmmm

...

the cats meow used, in previous years,

to have very goodlooking waitresses wearing

not every much

thigh and decollette

etc

which always made me, as a heterosexual male, feel

manipulated

like i feel genetically disposed to notice a

cleavage or

embonpoint

at 50 yards and

seeing there was lots of cleave and thigh etc around

my eyes were always being distracted

...

which does not make me feel comfortable

so i'm relieved they now wear more